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"Always listen to experts. They'll tell you what can't be done and why. Then do it."
- Robert Heinlein
 |
| Rex Regenerator (Mechanotherapist) | ||
| Mechanotherapy device cures homicidal urges. |
Elwood Caswell was quite mad; but, fortunately, he knew he had a problem and went straight to the 43rd Stree branch of Home Therapy Appliances, Inc.
| "...What have you got for homicidal
mania?"
The clerk pursed his lips. "Schizophrenic or manic-depressive origins?" "I don't know," Caswell admitted, somewhat taken aback. "It really doesn't matter," the clerk told him. "Just a private theory of my own. From my experience in the store, redheads and blonds are prone to schizophrenia, while brunettes incline toward the manic-depressive." "That's interesting. Have you worked here long?" "A week. Now then, here is just what you need, sir." He put his hand affectionately on a squat black machine with chrome trim.
 (Mechanotherapy devices from 'Bad Medicine') "What's that?" "That, sir, is the Rex Regenerator, built by General Motors. Isn't it handsome? It can go with any decor and opens up into a well-stocked bar. Your friends, family, loved ones need never know--" "Will it cure a homicidal urge?" Caswell asked. "A strong one?" "Absolutely. Don't confuse this with the little ten amp neurosis models. This is a hefty, heavy-duty, twenty-five amp machine for a really deep-rooted major condition." "That's what I've got," said Caswell, with pardonable pride. "This baby'll jolt it out of you. Big, heavy-duty thrust bearings! Oversize heat absorbers! Completely insulated! Sensitivity range of over--" "I'll take it," Caswell said. "Right now. I'll pay cash." |
| Technovelgy from Bad Medicine,
by Robert Sheckley. Published by Galaxy in 1956 Additional resources -
|
Here are the directions for proper use:
Unfortunately, Mr. Caswell was in a hurry, and took the model off the sales floor. Which was intended for use by Martians. Who can't even process the concept of homicide. This turns out to be a problem.
Compare this device with
the robot psyche tester from Colony (1953) by Philip K. Dick,
Sigrid von Shrink from Gateway (1970) by Frederik Pohl,
the machine psychologist from James Blish's Cities in Flight,
Dr. Smile, from Dick's 1964 novel The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch.
To Operate All Rex Model Regenerators:
And that's all! Your Regenerator will do the rest! There will be no
language bar or dialect problem, since the Regenerator communicates by
Direct Sense Contact (Patent Pending).
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Rex Regenerator (Mechanotherapist)-related
news articles:
- Electric Head Patch Helps PTSD Patients
| MouthPad Supports Head And Tongue Tracking |
| Drug Induces Hibernation-Like State In Humans |
| Drug To Regenerate Teeth In Humans |
| Illustrating Classic Heinlein With AI |
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'...the rocket’s landing-arms automatically unfolded.'
'...points and patches of light... sliding all over their faces in a programmed manner that had been designed to foil facial recognition systems.'
'...the combined Wind-Suncatcher, like a spray of tulips mounted fanwise.'
'I went to the control room where the three other men were manipulating their mechanical men.'
'The low-slung monorail car, straddling its single track, bored through the shadows on a slowly rising course.'
'It was a smooth ovoid floating a few inches from the floor...'
'... he thrust in his charging arm to replenish his store of energy.'
'...the terrible Jovian gravity that made each movement an effort.'
